Filling the Void

Truth be told, my life is not complete unless I’m writing. And I’m not sure why it took so long for me to figure that out.

Maybe because I’ve been so preoccupied this past year, watching almost helplessly as my job, children, and unexpected drama slowly took over my life. It happens. Kids start growing up. Decisions need to be made so they can have a better chance to excel in school and athletics. Dads become coaches. Mom becomes a coach’s wife and supermom all while struggling to remain focused at a job that had doubled its duties and hours. I was a mess.

So I thought, “Something needs to go.” And out went shooting and blogging. I couldn’t keep photography appointments when my days kept getting longer and longer. And I sure as hell couldn’t blog because who the hell has time for THAT anymore, especially if they have a 3-year-old son who keeps trying to poop his pants while hiding in the closet?

BUT, even though I was not writing and shooting, I managed to FACEBOOK AND TWEET LIKE HELL. Updating everyone on just about everything, which helped me keep my sense of humor.

Would love to be on #maternity leave without the hassle of the whole “having a baby” thing. #lazy #badparent

I just watched a dog play the accordion. And no, IM NOT DRUNK.

If there was a doctor who would prescribe it RIGHT THIS MINUTE, I’d totally give Benny ritalin. He just broke a cash register at Costco. Yes, I AM THAT MOM RIGHT NOW.

I told him [the LOML] that I made “#Friday” my ringtone, and he said, “You mean the ‘Just Got Paid’ song?” #seriously

Forgot my phone was in my bra, so u can imagine my surprise when #pandora started up. Music to my boobs! AT WORK. #awkward

In fact, after just about every Facebook post, someone would say, “You need to put that on your blog.” And I’d be all “what blog”? I don’t write anymore! Writing is for people who have time to sit and think and gather thoughts that are RELEVANT. I barely have time to make sure I’m wearing UNDERWEAR before I leave in the morning, let alone be a blogger again. No way. That part of my life is behind me! Right?

What I didn’t realize was that I was, indeed, WRITING. Just in small bursts. Just enough to keep me from losing my mind. And I JUST HAD to share what was happening, because dammit, if I was going to experience the kind of crazy ass shit that was going on in my life, I was going to do it with anyone with a cell phone and a connection to Facebook or Twitter. I did NOT want to be alone.

Whenever I picked up my phone to post something, the LOML would give me one of his “sideways” looks and say, “Now what?” and I’d reply, “It’s the closest thing I can get to blogging. Give a sister a break. I miss it, you know . . .” And then he’d say, “So, go blog,” and then we’d get into it about how we never have time to do anything anymore because we’re so busy. Which was a whole new experience to us, since we weren’t used to arguing.

And just when I thought I was going to go off the deep end, things at the office settled down, and I was back to working the awesome hours that lured me to the company in the first place. I was getting part of my life back.

My afternoons and evenings would be free of my work laptop, and *I* would be free to do other things.

Free to shoot. Free to write. Free to Zumba. Free to start addressing some of the drama that had been piling up.

Free to hit happy hour on the way home.

I don’t know how long this is going to last. But I don’t care. I’m writing and shooting again.

And I am whole.

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07 2011

6 Comments Add Yours ↓

The upper is the most recent comment

  1. Jennifer #

    You’re so AWESOME! I wanna be you when I “grow up”….Love ya girl…you deserve to blog and shoot…we deserve it too! Now text me next time you’re hitting up a happy hour! :)

  2. Nic #

    Kathleen! Happy Friday, stranger! So nice to see you’re back at it. I’ve missed you.

    Life settles down. In 15 years. :0)




  3. 3

    Yay! Welcome back :-)

  4. Annette #

    Missed you! ! I can’t wait to receive your gems of stellar observations once again!
    Annette Gustavson

  5. Kathleen #

    @Jennifer! You are too much! You know I think of you as a sister (as do my other family members), and love love that you are a part of my life! Let’s do Emma’s soon!!!

    @Nic — NICCCCCC!!! I was so SO happy to see your reply! I mean, I was happy to see that you replied, but happier to know that I’ve only got 15 years before I can stop taking Valium! LOL!!

    @Elisa!! Thank you for keeping me in your feed!!! I saw those cute little shoes and I knew EXACTLY who it was before reading the comment!!

    @Annette!! I am so thrilled you are still following my antics. I promise to keep everyone on their toes and wishing they’d gone pee before reading what I have to say!

    @Everyone — Thank you for your support; you have no idea what that means to me!!!

  6. Lisa Lisa #

    Good to have you back!!!

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